Best friend says she can't friends with me anymore if I date her ex! How selfish/unreasonable??

My best friend has had something going on with this guy for ages, and they started dating three years ago. We're 19 and he broke up with her earlier this year. He and I are also best friends. I hit on him when they were thinking about getting together in the first place, and because him and I are so close she's had trust issues about us ever since.

My boyfriend broke up with me earlier this year and my best friend has just started seeing someone else. I know I want to end up with my ex boyfriend. When I've tried to raise the fact I want to be with my best friend's ex with her, she gets really angry and upset. She has said now that if I really want to be with him, then I should do it, but that she doesn't want to be friends with me anymore. This makes me really angry because I don't think she has the right to feel that way now that she is seeing someone else. I haven't had much luck with boys lately, this could be my chance to move on. What do you think I should do?

Best friend says she can't friends with me anymore if I date her ex! How selfish/unreasonable????????girls myspace

They dated for 3 years? That's a lot of history to get involved in. If I had that much history with a guy and he broke up with me, I would be upset if my best friend started dating him. Friends don't do that. I couldn't be around them because I would know things about him, imagine him doing things with her, and we could never get together as a group.

No, you should seek out someone else. Be friends with this guy, but don't take it beyond that. It's disrespectful, and you'll most certainly lose your best friend because of it.

Best friend says she can't friends with me anymore if I date her ex! How selfish/unreasonable????????skinny myspace myspace.com

I'm with her....bad idea.
if you are friends with someone you wouldnt even think of dating her ex....... they are off limits just out of respect .......!!!!
It's a bad idea to date someone's ex. Chances are it won't work out in the end anyway. So then you've lost a boyfriend and a friend. Keep your friendship and find someone else.
3 billion men on the planet and you have to date this one?

Move on.
You can't tell her how to feel, if this is the way she feels then that's that and you are going to have to choose, best friend or boyfriend you can't have both.
You never date your best friends ex. Ever. That is friendship 101.
Sounds like she is not really your friend.

Maybe she still likes him and she is just trying to make him jealous.
you kno if she's really ur best friend she'll do anything just to became u happy and that was old relationship w/ them so go for it if u really like the guy
If you do, you were never a real friend. Grow up.
come on, they were together for ages, remember?

maybe she still has feelings for him even if she doesn't say it.

best leave it at that.
Un written rule, dont date your friends ex's. If you do, you will lose the friendship. So, make your choice
"friends" ex's ar always off limits... associates on the other hand is different. are you a friend or an ASSociate?
Realize that you are the one being selfish.

Admit that this guy is more important than your friendship. Lose the friend..date the guy..have the guy dump you and lose him then grow up and move on with your life.

enjoy being 19!
You still want to end up with your ex? Then what are you gonna do with this guy just use him. I'm 30 yrs old and had two best friends and we made a pact to never date the others ex's and one married mine and I dated two of the others. I really wish we would have kept the pact it would have saved some trouble! How good of friends are you with her?
Well i think you are selfish if u dont respect her wishes it is a sensitive subject for her
Yes, She is being selfish. Although its gunna be hard for her she needs to get over it. You do what you want. If he likes you go for it. She shouldn't be like that she doesnt own you. If he want's to go there do it.... But give it sometime dont rush.. I'd say maybe a month or 2
I think you should be a better friend. Girls don't mess with their friend's ex-boyfriends. It's too complicated. You are the one being selfish and unreasonable. You need to apologize to your friend and keep your hands off her ex.
You have no right to try and control her feelings. She has told you how she feels. It doesn't matter if you agree with her or not they are her feelings.

You now make your decisions based on the information that is available.

Which is more important her friendship, or the possibility of a relationship with him?
i think u are being selfish and unreasonable, she was with him for 3 years, not 3 months... she prob still has feelings for him which is normal, how would u feel if she started dating your x who u had been with for 3 years
just depends on how much ur friend means to you , she my still av feelings for him .wud u lik it if it wuz the other way round ? if it dn't work out tho ul sorry to av lost ur friend think bout this carefully before u make a decision, gud luck
boyfriends come and go best friends are for life. my rule is he is off limits if 1. my gf dated him, 2. if my gf even likes him. if you date this guy then you will have to accept that she doesnt want to be friends. how would you feel if this was done to you
Wow, I see what she means. Together for that long and he broke up with her. I'd be pissed. I'd say go for it, but the fact that he broke up with her means she didnt want to end the relationship. So she might still have feels for this guy. But on the other hand she is your friend and she should want you to be happy. Maybe she is still heart broken. I would talk to her about and tell her everything and all, but she is your friend and would you really let a guy ruin your friendship?
Try and look at this the other way around. If it was your ex. You wouldn't want her to be with him either.

He broke up with her, and hurt her feelings very badly.

By wanting to be with him, you pretend that her feelings don't matter.

In a friendship, that is the worst thing to do, discard what the friend is feeling.

If your feelings for this boy (the ex) are real. Give her time to get over this relationship (Even if she is in a new one right now, it takes time to get over these things!!). And see were you guys are then.

My advice, stick with your best girlfriend right now, she needs you. As for the boy, give it time, you'll know what to do, in time. But do not rush things, or you could end up loosing both.
I hope you are reading the answers carefully. As everyone else said, don't date him, out of loyalty for your friend. It's just not right. Is this guy worth losing your best friend over?
I found out a good friend of mine started dating my ex. When we broke up, she broke my heart and my friend knew how much I cared for her and did it anyway. Since he clearly has no regard for how I feel, I have not spoken to him again and never will. That is not a "friend". Now, if he had come to me and asked if I would be ok with him dating her, I would have respected him a lot more, and it would have strengthened our friendship. I think you should make another communication about this to your friend. Let her know that your friendship means more than this potential relationship so you will not do anything to jeopardize it, but you mean her no harm and would really like the opportunity to date him since they obviously are finished anyway. If she says no, respect that and don't cross the line. If you do cross the line, you aren't much of a friend because you clearly don't care much about your friend's feelings, just like my Friend did not care about me and my feelings. Breaking up hurts and your friend obviously cared for this guy. Don't hurt her like he did....
She isnt a true friend if she is going to stop you from your possible love

A good friends would support you no matter what
Tell her to suck a fat one, and be your own person!! Do what you wanna do, not what someone else tells you to do.